Dream Big, but Fail.
P1. Achieving happiness is a fundamental goal that we all strive to obtain in life. Unfortunately, that journey towards happiness is something we struggle with throughout the course of our lives. We often end up disappointed with out destination because we build up unrealistic expectation of our goals and misinterpret what it is that actually makes us happy. We let our destination overshadow our journey, when it is the journey that really generates our true happiness. We have the capability of being happy in our lives as long as we move forward and don’t build up our futures to unrealistic heights.
P2. To understand why most of us aren’t approaching happiness correctly, we must first understand synthetic happiness. Synthetic happiness is what our mind generates when scenarios in our lives don’t turn out how we initially intended. It’s that safety net that catches us when we fail and keeps us going. Dan Gilbert is a psychologist at Harvard University who makes a strong case for synthetic happiness. In his Ted Talk he asks who would be happier in a year’s time: a paraplegic who lost the use of her legs, or a man who hit the lottery. It’s a tricky question because we naturally want to say that the lottery winner is the happiest. Dan Gilbert counters by saying they’re both equally happy within a year. Examining this example can demonstrate the importance of synthetic happiness and the negative effects that expectations can have.
P3. First we can look at the lottery winner. When the man wins the lottery his happiness certainly spikes. He’s on top of the world for a while, but no matter how careful he is with his new found wealth that spike will drop. Money is a fantastic resource to have in bulk, but we often overestimate it. Every time we purchase a lottery ticket we think about what our future would be like if we won. It’s important to remember that happiness is relative. We all have problems in our lives and we gauge the seriousness of them relative to our livelihood. New things will arise in this man’s life to level off his spike, and he’ll realize that winning the lottery can’t possibly fix all his problems. This leaves him disappointed though certainly not unhappy.
P4. Now we can examine the paraplegic argument. Here we see someone whose life takes a dramatic downward spike to contrast the lottery winner. What brings her up to that middle point is synthetic happiness. Clearly this woman would be traumatized and frightful when her life is first changed. Her future has suddenly changed and her life will now be very different. As time progresses however, she gradually works herself up to that middle point. A year from the surgery she may be a speaker to help prevent similar accidents happening to others. She synthesizes happiness to be okay with the situation and she may ultimately decide that it changed her life for the best. She might cherish her life more, and believe that she now contributes more to the world. Then again, she might not. This is something that isn’t addressed in the TED talk.
P5. Perhaps the biggest flaw with Gilbert’s philosophy is that there are many unhappy people in this world. He is certainly right about a lot of things, but he sits slightly off the mark. It is easy to argue that people are unhappy; we live in a world where smaller nations are in civil war, starvation is a rampant, and a large part of the population are homeless. These people may synthesize some happiness, but it’s safe to assume they would switch places with the lottery winner in a heart beat. This is a perfectly legitimate stance and one that can’t be countered by the concept of synthetic happiness alone. A lot of people are born into lives that hold them in one dreadful place. They aren’t able to move forward and progress so it’s hard to synthesize any sort of happiness. They key component in happiness that isn’t addressed in Gilbert’s approach is that happiness really comes from the small victories we achieve along our journey.
P6. The concepts of synthetic happiness and unrealistic expectations are still relevant, because they are directly related to finding happiness in our journey towards our goals. If a child decides at a young age that she wants to attend Columbia, she sets a goal. That goal of Columbia lingers above her head as her ideal future and she naturally builds up the high expectations aforementioned. Every step she takes towards that dream however is what builds true happiness. Every test that kid gets an A on brings her one step closer. Those moments make her happy because they are all working towards that ideal future and she is slowly progressing forward. We find happiness when our hard work pays off. Ironically though, achieving that goal may not make us happiest.
P7. Since unrealistic expectations are rampant amongst most of our minds, achieving our goals doesn’t always fully satisfy us. Plenty of people achieve their dreams and are happy, there is no arguing that, but they often long for their built up expectations that reality can never fully live up to. This may leave the girl a little disappointed because Columbia was her ultimate goal and she can no longer reach for something higher. Believe it or not, falling a little short could leave her less disappointed. The initial failure would of course be devastating, but synthetic happiness would be there to rationalize her situation. She still has that happiness of progress that has come from her journey and she still has that dream that she almost achieved, but didn’t tarnish with reality. She may realize she is saving money and avoiding debt, she may realize that she has friends she would never have gained, a favorite teacher she would never have met and so on. Not achieving her ideal future allows her mind to synthesize and be happy with what she has instead of being disappointed with the future she can never fully achieve. Her failure can be the spawn of many new dreams and ambitions to replace the old one. This keeps her constantly moving forward instead of being stuck at the top.
P8. Of course there are exceptions to everything. It is easy to counter by thinking of examples where things do turn out just as imagined, but it is much easier to recall times when they did not. Things often don’t work out as planned, but we are still happy regardless. Synthetic happiness would certainly take its course with our dissatisfaction of our realized dream, but our built up expectations keep it from every truly making us happy. This doesn’t mean we should not dream big because it is the journey towards that dream that really inspires our true happiness. It is falling short of that dream that leaves us happy with our accomplishments and allows us to keep climbing towards our dreams.
P9. Every single person is different and thinks and perceives things differently. Dreaming big is what sets us on our path and motivates us to work hard. Trying to conquer the tallest mountain and going where no one has gone before is what makes each victory towards that so rewarding. We can never move forward if we set our goals where everyone else is at, and they’ll never be those exceptions if we don’t progress forward. We should always leave room for the journey and never set a realistic destination. Of course we don’t all achieve our dreams, but chasing them gets us those constant small victories throughout our life. Synthetic happiness is there to make our failure fulfilling, and always having the dream to reach for keeps our eyes set ahead. There are unhappy people in the world, but it is there lack of ability to progress that makes them truly unhappy. Progressing is what is important and stopping that progress whether it be from reaching our peak, or being constrained by external forces can leave us craving something that isn’t there. We can never be fully happy if we are stuck whether it be at the top or the bottom. We must dream big, but fail to be truly happy.
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Counterintuitive Fall 2022 
Hey Professor!
This is my first draft and is by no means done. I have to add sources and fix inconsistencies throughout. I just figured I’d let you know.
Hey Professor, I’ve done a run through and cleaned up some inconsistencies. A FFG check would be much appreciated and any feedback you provide will certainly not fall on deaf ears!
Feedback (FFG) provided. —DSH
Feedback provided. —DSH
Professor it would be awesome if you could give me some detail feedback on this. I’m begging you. Beg. Beg. Beg.
Paragraphs numbered for FFG check. (plus more, as I see before I even get through the first paragraph)
P1. everyone’s (singular) lives (plural). Same old error.
—This causes us to have misconceptions about our future leaving us displeased with what we have. (not until we get there)
—While happiness certainly is a fundamental goal in everyone’s lives its subjectivity and overall variance in perception amongst everyone leads us to believe that it must be at least partially synthesized. (makes no sense)
I thought your thesis was that since we can synthesize happiness, we’re all happier than our actual conditions would indicate. We aim, we fail, yet we make ourselves happy. Right? Why don’t I get that feeling from your opening paragraph. It all seems to be about dissatisfaction.
P2.
—There are plenty examples,
—TED talk
I haven’t listened to the talk, but the way you describe this scenario is always weird. Does Gilbert withhold the “within a year” part as you do?
—Don’t brag about this fantastic example until you can prove it’s a fantastic example. It sounds insane, so get to the demonstration first.
P3. —The main component here [of what!? we have no idea what you’re demonstrating yet] is his misconceptions of the future.
General observation about your argument technique, John. You make one or two claims in a row (RED), then introduce a large amount of seemingly irrelevant material without any preparation (GREEN), then try to reconcile the two components later (BLUE). I’ve color-coded two examples.
P4. This paragraph avoids the problem I’ve color coded above. It follows the woman’s path straight through, making its claims about her specific situation (relating them to the general, but staying particular).
P5. Perhaps the biggest flaw in Gilbert’s argument is that of the million paraplegics, one a handful turn their catastrophe to advantage the way the woman in the example does. Her case shows that happiness CAN be synthesized (maybe); it certainly doesn’t prove that synthesis is common.
You work your way toward a nice exit strategy from this paragraph, John. I feel the next step coming, but you could do more to guide us. Who hasn’t seen starving kids gleefully playing on rubbish piles, somehow happy despite their desperate straits? You could give us a hint as we go through this paragraph that outward conditions aren’t the whole story.
P6. The vagueness inherent in sentences like this hurt more than anything, John: The concepts of synthetic happiness and misconceived futures are still relevant, but we must understand their place in our journey because that is what truly dictates happiness. (The only way to understand this sentence is that synthetic happiness and our misconceived futures dictate our happiness. If that makes any sort of sense to you, god bless you.)
Last time, I promise: A freaking child cannot be referred to as THEY, THEIR, THEIR, THEY, and THEIR, in the order in which you make these five errors of number disagreement. Children could be, but A child, one child, is singular. The pronouns are all plural.
These are nice ideas. The satisfaction of small goals achieved is a good definition of happiness, even for kids on the rubbish heap who find an orange peel. But that doesn’t mean the goal of Columbia is “misconceived.” Be careful about that.
P7. Again, satisfaction can come from making progress without the ultimate goal being misconceived. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be arguing with your argument. But maybe I’m not. I agree the future can disappoint, even when the goal is achieved. It’s just the term I object to. Couldn’t you call them disappointing futures instead of misconceived futures? There’s nothing wrong with the concept that Columbia will satisfy her.
You claim WAY too much when you say nobody can be satisfied with Columbia and that your test subject would have been happier with her second choice. This can’t be true, can it?
P8. OK, you’re committed to the thesis. I admire that. One more suggestion. Does falling short a little bit inspire another goal? If we never quite accomplish the specific goal we intended, but replace it with another, we could always be in that happy state of making progress toward the next. Right?
P9. No, you didn’t. Base our dreams OFF of that?
This paragraph comes closest to being persuasive of your overall thesis, John. I have one last idea that would change the tactics of your essay without sacrificing the strategy (look up the difference if you don’t know it already).
You waste a lot of energy (and confuse your readers in the process) insisting that Gilbert overgeneralizes from his examples and ignores the numbers of people whose experience doesn’t fit his theory, etc. Why bother? You don’t have to defend or refute Gilbert. Just use what’s useful to promote your own thesis and ignore where he gets it wrong. Start with what you believe, stay with what you believe, refer to Gilbert where his talk supports you, and you can ignore that he overclaims, as long as you don’t overclaim yourself.
Except for those $*@! number disagreements you can’t avoid, this is grammatically clean, John.
I complain a lot about your argument, but I’m comfortable with your overall conclusions. We’re happy pursuing a goal. The goal achieved is often disappointing. Most goals are preliminary to additional goals. The happiest person keeps moving the goal line.
Thank you for the detailed feedback on this and my definition essay Professor. I apologize if I came off impatient in my new comments, I just wanted to get my name back in the side column.
No problem, John. It was me who told you to beg. I only went to profanity for the sake of the joke, which I’m sure you got. 🙂 —DSH
Hello Professor,
I just got done doing some revisions. I just wanted to say that your feedback helped me realize a major flaw in my writing. I love to write fiction and I feel like I may have been approaching this semesters work in a similar fashion. I realized that I was building up to my point like it was a big reveal. I’ve been withholding information from my reader when I should just be coming right out and saying it. In my first draft I didn’t state my point until the end of PARAGRAPH 5!!
“They key component in happiness that isn’t addressed in Gilbert’s approach is that happiness really comes from the journey.”
I’ve gone through and tried to clean this up to make it a better and stronger paper overall. I’m not done because I’m still trying to get the flow right, but I hope the revisions work. Just thought I would write this because your feedback helped a lot. I think its fitting that my final paper for your class reaped some serious magic beans.
Thank you for the goosebumps, John. You must surely know the joy I feel at delivering the beans, no matter how long it takes. You must also be a clever reader to understand for yourself what I didn’t quite articulate for you.
Your P3 here is still a good example of withholding for a big reveal that doesn’t pay off as well as it should.
Try these out if you’re willing. Very Short Novels. Good readers are most welcome.
Graded for portfolio.