Taking extra steps to maintain a healthy body may actually ruin it. Multivitamin companies have been telling people for years that it is healthy to consume their products with no negative repercussions. They consistently push their products on people by telling them that taking the multivitamins will lead to a healthier lifestyle. These companies fail to tell their customers the negative affects that these vitamins have on a normal human body. Multivitamins are meant for people who have vitamin deficient diets and should not be taken by someone who has a steady nutritional diet.
Being healthy is the state of being free from illness and injury. Vitamin companies claim that their products can make a person live a healthier lifestyle. This is false if a person already does not get either hurt or sick. What these companies fail to tell customers is that taking multivitamins could lead to an unhealthy lifestyle. If a healthy person takes multivitamins, they could be doing more damage to themselves than if they did not take multivitamins. The saying if “one is good, more is better” does not apply to this subject.
Most people live a “healthy” lifestyle just by eating a balanced diet. Foods have every vitamin the body needs to live an illness and injury free life. Taking multivitamins on top of having a balanced diet is extremely unhealthy and could even be toxic. Some effects of taking to much of a vitamin are birth defects, hemorrhaging, blood clotting, kidney stones, liver failure and many more harmful effects on the body. These are all results of what attempting to live a healthy lifestyle can do. According to livescience.com three recent studies have shown that multivitamins are ineffective at reducing risk of disease and could be harmful to the body. Another study posted in the Annals of Internal Medicine showed that multivitamins do not slow down or prevent chronic diseases.
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Counterintuitive Fall 2022 
Taking extra steps to maintain a healthy body may actually ruin it.
Noted. —DSH
Original:
Multivitamin companies have been telling people for years that it is healthy to consume their products with no negative repercussions. They consistently push their products on people by telling them that taking the multivitamins will lead to a healthier lifestyle. These companies fail to tell their customers the negative affects that these vitamins have on a normal human body. Multivitamins are meant for people who have vitamin deficient diets and should not be taken by someone who has a steady nutritional diet.
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Ideas of the paragraph:
~Companies advertise their product as healthy
~they have no negative repercussions
~they are negative when taken by a normal person
~the vitamins are meant for someone with a deficiency
It seems like the paragraph could be combined into a few smaller sentences:
~Multivitamin companies have been pushing their products on consumers by saying that they will lead to a healthier lifestyle with no negative repercussions.
~However, they conveniently neglect to mention how their product is only meant to be used by people with a vitamin deficiency and that they should not be taken by someone with a normal diet.
———————————-
try making it sound interesting:
Marketers of multivitamin companies have advertised their product as a healthy supplement, and yet they conveniently leave out the fact that they are not meant for everybody.
Noted. —DSH
Supplement companies preaching the effectiveness of their products, such as multivitamins, have conveniently left out the the negative repercussions. With so many people striving to live a healthy lifestyle they have an infinite supply of consumers to by their products not knowing of the harmful effects.
Noted. —DSH
Erik, your essay is already strong, but you’ve received very helpful advice here from John, Vinny, and Luke. John’s suggestion is a much stronger opener than your own. My own recommendation would be to combine both the danger of multivitamins and the added insult that we pay for them, in effect trading in our cash for a chance to do ourselves harm and rarely any good. (A character on “The Big Bang Theory” said multivitamins are a recipe for making very expensive urine.)
Vinny does a nice job of condensing your first-paragraph claims into just a couple of dense sentences that accomplish the goals of emphasizing the small size of the population that can benefit from the products, balanced by the dangers to others who already get enough vitamins and will effectively be overdosing.
Luke identifies the motivation from the consumer side, something you pay little attention. Your claims are almost exclusively from the seller side. You would benefit from representing both.
I don’t think it would be wise to adopt the sarcastic “conveniently neglect to tell us” tone though. Your “fail to tell” is claim enough. You could go further and claim that the sellers actively suppress the fact that overtaking vitamins can make us ill (stronger than neglecting to mention, more damning, more serious).
I hope you find all these recommendations helpful.
Make grammar corrections to release your grade from FFG quarantine, please.
Sorry for taking so long to fix the grammar mistakes. I wasn’t aware that this post received so many comments.